Every time I think that we as women will be able to escape the shackles of the patriarchy some day, I am quickly brought back down to Earth by some pick me shit. Last night’s Grammys was no exception.

The 67th annual Grammys was an incredibly fun night, and a banner evening for women, queer people, and people of color. The president of the Grammys even came out and issued a public apology to the Weeknd and talked about how the Grammys voting pool has added 3,000 new women since 2021, and is now 40% people of color.

Beyonce won Best Country Album AND Album of the Year for Cowboy Carter, her first AOTY win, Doechii became the 3rd woman ever to win Best Rap Album, citing the prior two winners Lauryn Hill and Cardi B in her acceptance speech (Cardi B also presented her the award). Every single nominee for Best Pop Solo Recording was not only a woman but a QUEER woman! Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars won Best Pop Duo/Group Performance, and Mother Monster got on stage and made a speech about trans visibility and rights.

Shakira gave a performance that made me relive my gay awakening, and used her acceptance speech to advocate for immigrants.

And most impactful to me, Chappell Roan won Best New Artist after a BANGER of a performance of Pink Pony Club (and while dressed as a pillow princess) and then got up on that stage and gave a speech about how artists deserve to be paid a living wage with health insurance, shaking and trembling the whole way through, knowing how much she was risking, but with every artist in the crowd standing, supporting her, and many crying. What a NIGHT! Oh, and Lady Gaga released the music video for her new song Abracadabra which is a BANGER and I CANNOT wait for her album and to see her at Coachella!

And because of the laws of the universe, we cannot have queer joy without a whole lot of straight nonsense. Take Taylor Swift’s outfit:

Holy MOLY! How HOT is she?????? HELP!!!!!

Taylor’s gorgeous Vivienne Westwood dress featured a custom Lorraine Schwartz ‘T’ studded with the rubies that she gave up, so scarlet they were maroon. We love this! It’s sexy! T for Taylor! That’s what everyone thinks, right? Right??????

Oh… what’s that? They’re saying it’s T for… Travis??? And that she’s wearing red for… the Kansas City Chiefs?

But what about… her album Red that she released 13 (!!!) years ago? And then re-released in 2021?

What about her song Maroon which was on the album for which she won Album of the Year last year?

What about, oh I don’t know, the whole WORLD of red outside the colors of the Kansas City Chiefs?????

What about this????

On the night she presented Best Country Album to Beyonce, I feel this is no coincidence!

Alas! It MUST be about a man. A woman cannot make a single fashion choice without a man being involved. CLEARLY!

I just… sigh. The most obvious interpretation is that it’s T for Taylor, and that’s that. What if I killed myself?

Taylor Nation even tweeted that it’s T for ‘Tortured’ - you know, the album she was nominated for in a host of categories - but, alas.

Also, Taylor won no Grammys this year (and neither did my Pisces rising sister Billie Eilish which is a DAMN SHAME as Hit Me Hard and Soft is a MASTERPIECE) but it’s fine. Most of her fans and the general public still think it’s an album about Matty Healy and not the two versions of herself, religious guilt, her relationship with her fans, closeting, etc, and it feels a little more like an inside secret. I’m just happy knowing Drake had a TERRIBLE night; Kendrick Lamar’s ‘Not Like Us’ was the first diss track to ever win Best Rap Song and hearing all these A-List artists sing A MINORRRRRR live was truly an EXPERIENCE.

Anyway, I hate it here so I will go to lunar valleys in my mind! Here is some lesbian joy from last night! God I hope she comes out soon so people can stop attributing her success to men!!!!!!!

Taylor Swift’s Grammy’s Look: Can a WomAn Be Hot Without A Man Getting Credit?????

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